One Tree Hill Episode Recap: “A Hand to Take Hold of the Scene”

By Carrie Raisler,

Hilarieburton_onetreehill_s5_240One Tree Hill is heavy on the romance tonight, with two new couples just beginning, another one ending, and the remaining two standing surprisingly strong. This light, fun hour is the perfect way to recover from the melodrama of last week.

Brooke and Sam are dealing with the aftermath of last week’s confrontation with creepy Brooke-beater, with Sam repeatedly trying to get in touch with creepy Brooke-beater’s brother Jack to no avail. She finally tracks him down and tries to assuage his fears about having to go to a foster home, letting him know that she’ll always be there for him. And…yawn. Listen, I am warming up to Sam but I don’t think she needs to have her own storylines and scenes yet. Her with Brooke? Is perfectly fine. Her with other random people? Is a bit too much, too soon.

As for Brooke, Julian stops by her apartment to check in on her and deliver the latest tabloid cover about her exploits with vigilante justice. Julian is extremely understanding, supportive, and — dare I say it — cute during this encounter. Could I be warming to this impending Brooke/Julian pairing? Seeing as Julian is about 20 times more interesting than any new character has been on this show in a while, all signs point to yes. They agree to meet later that night to go over costumes for the film and all of Brooke’s friends call it a date until even Brooke herself believes it and completely overdresses for the meeting, causing awkwardness. They get down to work and during the course of the night Julian admits that he feels like he knows her because of the book, saying he read it for Peyton but related to it because of her. They continue to talk and suddenly the wine, candles and dim lighting are making this so-called meeting seem a lot like a real-life date. They try to keep things all business but can’t hold back their feelings, and their “meeting” ends in a kiss. I think they’re cute! I’m sure since he is Peyton’s ex this is all going to go to hell, but I have a feeling I’m going to enjoy it while it lasts.

Peyton is busy doing the time-honored tradition of women who just found out they’re pregnant by stuffing something under their shirt so they see what they’ll look like in nine months. When Lucas catches her in the act she pouts, saying “I just realized I’m going to be pregnant on our wedding day, and that is so redneck.” Hee. Peyton is also worried about telling Brooke about the pregnancy considering how much Brooke wants a baby of her own, but when she spills the news it turns out Brooke is only upset because she just finished Peyton’s wedding dress and it has a corset. A painstakingly hand stitched corset. Hee, again.

Lucas and Peyton take care of Jamie and Andre (Q’s little brother) for “practice” being parents and, although they go all out planning what they think is the perfect kids night (movies, macaroni arts and crafts and Mouse Trap), they all end up playing poker instead because Jamie is 6 going on 36. The boys quickly tire Lucas and Peyton out, and when Nathan and Haley arrive they find Jamie awake and Lucas and Peyton down for the count. I feel their pain. I watched my six-year-old niece for one day over the Christmas holidays and MAN I slept good that night. Overall, the babysitting experience went very well and taught them that they will be just fine as parents.

Mouth and Millicent, meanwhile, meet to go over the aftermath of their boring and failed relationship. When Mouth acts possessive over Millie giving her virginity to someone other than him, Millicent wisely and maturely responds: “My virginity was mine, Marvin. It was never yours.” Preach it, girl. Mouth warns Millie to have fun telling Brooke about sleeping with Owen, and I am curious as to why Brooke would care. She rejected Owen numerous times, and in the end wanted nothing to do with him. Of course, the show stupidly makes Brooke care because they are all about inconsistent characterizations, and when Millie confesses Brooke meanly orders her out of the house. Thank goodness at the last minute Brooke sees how upset Millie is and gives her a hug instead. Brooke even goes to Mouth on Millie’s behalf and argues that what Millie did doesn’t have to be the end of their relationship, but Mouth disagrees. Millie shows up later, drunk, and offers herself to Mouth Joey Potter-style, but before he can accept or deny she has to excuse herself to be sick. Good call, Millie. After cleaning herself up, Millie apologizes and tells Mouth she is going to take a job in New York. Mouth agrees this would be best. Is this the end? I, for one, sure do hope so.

Mia is back again and working with Haley when Chase shows up to ask her out, and after embarrassing himself with a technological snafu Mia says yes. Mia starts freaking out about the date and threatens to cancel, until Haley steps in and offers to make it a double date with her and Nathan to ease any awkwardness. They meet at Tric for karaoke night and when Mia and Haley sign up to sing Nathan points out the inherent unfairness of this to the rest of the singers in the crowd. Luckily for those who can’t carry a tune, they actually secretly signed Nathan and Chase up to sing together instead, which the boys do gamely to “Bust a Move.” This is all intercut with little Jamie and Andre singing the same song on a karaoke machine at Peyton and Lucas’ house, by the way. Do I even need to point out the wrongness of two six-year-olds singing the lyrics “A chick walks by and you wish you could sex her but you’re standing on the wall like you was Poindexter?” Someone call child services! What are they going to sing next, “Lollipop?” Thinking about this nearly ruins my delight at seeing James Lafferty and Stephen Coletti rapping and dancing around like idiots. Nearly but not quite, because it’s rather silly and dorky and fun and cute, and nothing could completely ruin it. When Chase reveals that he is definitely into Mia, Nathan’s advice to him on having a touring girlfriend is basically, trust her but “If she ever meets someone named Chris Keller, you punch first and ask questions later.” Ha! At the end of the date, Chase panics and goes for the easy hug even though Mia is obviously putting out the “kiss me” vibes, but as he’s leaving thinks twice about it and goes back to lay one on Mia. They’re sort of cute, but I’m having a hard time remembering why I’m supposed to care. Except for the CHASE factor, they’re pretty snoozeville.

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