‘Ugly Betty’ moves back home

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Papi hires the nurse Elena (the lovely Lauren Velez of Dexter fame) because he thinks this will neutralize his family’s fussy overprotectiveness and allow him some autonomy. Idiota. The two butt heads, and she lets him know in no uncertain terms that she’s not just a seat filler, but will monitor his diet and exercise properly. After a bit of mule-headed resistance, he finally bows to her wisdom.

Meanwhile, Daniel and Molly continue to get cosy, and she’s even come up with a cute nickname for him: RJ, short for Rich Jerk. Damn straight. Why did he have to throw away 7 cents of change?

Unfortunately, Connor has been obsessing about the picture of Molly he saw in the tabloid — you know, the one where an unidentified man’s hand is holding hers. So Connor enlists Daniel’s help to stakeout her place in hopes of determining the identity of her new squeeze. A silly chain of events involving Betty, flowers and a T-shirt eventually lets Connor know that Daniel is the guy, and he gets KO’d during a sparring session at the gym.

Oddly enough, in guy fashion, that means everything is square between them. You lie, you get hit. End. Connor goes back to Wilhelmina and grovels a bit, and she welcomes him back into her cold, bitchy embrace.

Finally, Betty has her own romantic dilemma. She’s determined to move back home but makes excuse after excuse — she can’t find a roommate for Amanda to sublet the apartment, she has unfinished business with Jesse. Yup, artsy, sensitive musician dude has come back into the picture. After a two-wine bottle session and an impetuous kiss, Betty is more confused than ever.

When Jesse starts avoiding her, she’s had it and confronts him at one of his coffee house gigs. He apologizes — he’s so confused, he’s such a girl! — and asks her on a date. Later, on said date, the other shoe drops. He’s a total user. She’s warm and sweet, and he totally needs that right now. He’s a self-indulgent, self-involved artiste who funnels everything into his songs but gives very little in return. (Makes sense now how he was blind enough to her crush in the first place so that he made out with Amanda that other time).

Anyway, so Betty is not down with it. She tells him so in a very classy but unambiguous way. Wow. Then she goes back to her apartment and tells Amanda that she’s selected Marc as the perfect roommate to sublet the place. Back home Betty goes.

Highlights and musings:

– I really didn’t want Betty to give up her apartment, but now that it’s done, I better get some quality Familia Suarez action!
– Marc, on what Wil and Connor share a love for: “Fine dining, capitalism and late-night covert surveillances.”
– Is there such a thing as champagne pink? Cuz Willy looks amazing in that color.
– Still not feeling any of the D/M W/C romances.
– A huge relief that Jesse is done for good. Now then, writers, please bring back Gio. Kthxbye.
– How freaking weird/incestuous/hilarious was the MarcManda make out session? Love that they’re roomies now.